Sunday, January 08, 2006

Mahablogartha: Contemporary Contextualisation of Blogosphere Rants or CCBR Part 2

Disclaimer: This post is a work of fiction. However, resemblance to any person living or dead is not coincidental. They are real people some of them are my friends. I have merrily caricatured them. My apologies to the lay reader. This post is not for everyone and can only be understood and contextually appreciated by those who followed the controversy over my long comment against Libertarians and those who have a vague idea about contents of Amit, Gaurav and Ravikiran along with Shivam, Mridula Dilip D'Souza Great bong and Nilu's blogs.

continued from Episode I: Liberterminator 2

Episode II:Comments comments everywhere not a sensible one to read.

(A blog reader who goes by the name Indian or North Indian and who is the star commenter on Greatbong's blog enters the stage)

Narrator: This character has problems understanding meaning of the words such as satire, sarcasm, irony etc. It is a serious mental condition that afflicts a tiny minority who can be easily found in the comment section of Great Bong.

(Indian proceeds to sit on the computer and types his comment)

Indian says... posted on December 27, 2005 9:03 PM
Chetan thinks he knows economy? Economy my foot you should be sent to 3rd grade you oxymoron! Notice how he licks Laloo’s boots there. I bet that is because he is seeking a ticket from RJD. Only Indian politicians must be reading this blog. It caters only to their intellectual level. I bet he is that dickhead Ganguly’s ardent supporter. Some Chetan Chatterjee or something I am sure. A Bengali, Laloo supporter, commie sympathizer and a Ganguly lover to boot! Lord save India.

(TTG enters. @#^#@c &#% %@*# he keep uttering unintelligeble expletives while reading)

TTG says... comment posted on December 27, 2005 9:35PM
What the f***! On some other day I would have ranted but after reading this piece my throat has gone dry out of expletives.

(Seven Times Six enters the blog takes a quick glance at the article, reads skipping 10 lines at a time and then goes on to bang his comment)

Narrator: Chetan is finished now. Seven Times Six has read Atlas Shrugged 42 times and daily recites John Galt’s speech as morning prayer. Looks like this is going to be a lot of fun.

Seven_Times_Six says... comment posted on December 27, 2005 10:13 PM
Ugh. And what exactly is Chetan trying to say? Such backdoor statist apologists with uber ethical conceit! You make my blood boil!!!!! You are out to ruin our nation. Perhaps somebody (Ravikiran/Sauvik?) could start a discussion on some of the implementation aspects of an incentivized NGOisation of India?

(Shivam enters. Reads the comments goes towards the computer for commenting)

Shivam says... comment posted on December 27, 2005 10:13 PM
I am kicked about this Chetan. You have kicked my Libertarian friends real hard there. Now lets see what magical logical fallacy they conjure up to save their skin. And by the way I disagree on one point. Globalisations’ most celebrated baby is those horrid sweatshop call centres. The BHLs may come next. And Chetan I suggest you delete the comment by Indian and TTG. You ought to tell them that D***head and F*** are words fit to be in a urinal not on your blog.

(Wannabe Cartelian makes an entry. Reads the post twice. Occupies the Computer for a long time. Keeps reading all the wikipedia posts on Logical fallacies and after about an hours starts dancing while shouting Eureka! at the top of his lungs.)

Wannabe Cartelian: says... comment posted on December 27, 2005 10:43 PM
It is simple really! You are using the Broken Window fallacy. Just because the BHLs disrupt something and help the economy temporarily does not mean anything. The same money could have been productively used elsewhere. Have you ever come across something called opportunity costs? Ugh! And he thinks he is such a know all!

Wannabe Cartelian: (Singing aloud while dancing as he leaves the stage) I think this is it! I have scored it this time round. I am sure Ravikiran, Yazad or Madman will notice this absolute brilliance of mine in penetrating Chetan’s arguments. I better mug up all those fallacies before I sleep. They may call me anytime now for the interview to enter the cartel. I rock!

(Ravikiran enters with a solemn expression. Takes down a few notes and thinks hard. Then proceeds to the computer to type the comment.)

Ravikiran says... comment posted on December 27, 2005 11:23 PM
@Chetan What recursive caricaturing! Even me, the condescendingest cartelian, don’t tread this far out in my war against the non-cartelians. This is just too much.
@Wannabe Cartelians: At first I thought that Chetan was committing the good old Broken Window fallacy. But a closer reading will make it clearer that he is in fact pointing out the Broken Window fallacy. To be precise, he is pointing out that the GDP calculation fails to correct for the broken window problem. Is Chetan right? No. But which part is wrong and why?
Narrator: Ravikiran goes home and poses this same question on his blog. But three days and four trackbacks later the comment section is still blank. Ravikiran then went ahead and posted the answer and wondered aloud whether his blog traffic had dropped because none of the Cartelians could solve the question or whether one of the Cartelians had transmitted his selective amnesia to others. The Cartelians maintained their stoic silence even when the answer was posted and the comment section there too remained blank.

(Desipundit links to the post. Vulturo does not call this post brilliant rather links it without using a adjective. Titles the post Liberterminator Part 2. A trackback can be seen on the blog)

(Nilu enter the stage sneering)

Narrator: Here comes the maanga. He fancies himself as Karna who lost out his rightful place in the cartel to Yudhistira aka Gaurav. Gaurav earned his nicknameYudhistira because of his insistence on following the Dharma of right to freedom of speech during the IIPM fracas. Not many were happy about his assuming the name of a character from Mahabharat.

Nilu says...comment posted on December 28, 2005 1:23 AM
@Ravikiran: Why did you bother to state the obvious? Why are you beating to death these settled issues?
@Chetan I think I have found a replacement for Raapi finally. Chetan you replace Raapi and will be linked as Puke Fest #1 on my blog.

(Mridula enters, reads the comment and rushes to Desipundit)

Narrator: Mridula loved the post and wondered why Vulturo linking to it via Desipundit did not call it brilliant. She goes ahead and poses this question on Desipundit’s comments. Anirudh arrives there at the same moment and thinks that only Libertarian posts are getting tagged as brilliant. He too posts a comment there complaining about double standards. Vulturo sees the two comments and decides he has had enough of hearing backdoor statist positions for the day and goes ahead to delete the two comments. I think this is getting interesting by the minute.

(Mridula enters again, she looks mighty irritated and quickly types in the comment)

Mridula says... comment posted on December 28, 2005 1:23 AM
Sorry for the diversion everyone. But something has happened at Desipundit. Vulturo has deleted our comments. Here we are reclaiming our legacy and ushering in the revolution and all and this chap has the nerve to go on deleting our comments. Comrades it time to attack!

Dilip D’Souza says...comment posted on December 28, 2005 1:53 AM
@Chetan That post was so Heller like. Reminded me of Yossarian. I think what you said needed to be said. I hope this sensitises the city bred yuppies to think about the downtrodden. I just wish you had also spoken about the economic benefits of preventing slum demolition.

Narrator: There are a few anonymous commenters who have nothing better to do so they keep on entering Dilip’s name on technorati throughout the day and follow him wherever he goes.

(Immediately after Dilip leaves, Anonymous enters, the actor playing the part is wearing a saffron hood)

Anonymous says... comment posted on December 28, 2005 2:15 AM
Look at Dilip. Speaking about Hell and all. Peddling all these Christian concepts at the drop of a hat! And why I ask does he need to talk about the slum demolition. Just because all his favourite Muslims stay there!

(Shivam reenters)

Shivam says... comment posted on December 28, 2005 2:15 AM
@Mridula: Vulturo is my friend and therefore Chetan’s friend too. So it shouldn’t bother if he titles it Liberterminator or This post sucks. About deleting your comments, there ought to be a reasonable explanation and Vulturo is a good boy. Let us not jump to conclusions here shall we?

Mridula says... comment posted on December 28, 2005 2:56AM
@Shivam Yes, just because he is your friend does not give him the right to delete my opinions. And yea I will jump to whatever conclusions I deem fit. I don’t need you or your friend to tell me that. More power to your friendship, may it get you linked at DP for 'directly attacking' cartels again and again. I am going now to warn other comrades that we have a spy amidst us. Ugh! Such backdoor rightist Libertarians!

(Crystal Blur enters along with Vyasa and Ganpati )

to be continued...

Update: Read Episode 3: Meet the spoofer


Suhail Kazi said...

haha :) Sirjee, tussi great ho! Awaiting yr next instalments. That brokenwindow thing cracked me up!

Crystal Blur said...

Hasoon pot dukhlay. Ganapati Bappa chi kirpa aso.

Dilip D said...

Hello! I found a straw man in my bedroom, got frightened and shifted the goalposts, he told me that was a non-sequitur, so I leaped through the broken window and arrived here. Is this a Catch-22 situation or what?

Artful Dodger said...


What to say except wow. That you are erudite is beyond question. That you had such a great sense of humour was not known to me.

Some people may say, didnt he have any other topic to write on? But I know having written THAT comment and its subsequent reactions made an impact on you. These are but musings on that episode.

Carry on. This is a great exposure going on.

I am stilll lauging about that broken window fallacy thing. :) You da man.

The behaviour that certain people have done with Dilip D souza , a gentleman , is abominable to say the least. I swear to you Chetan, I could almost see several prominent (sic) bloggers through the anon masks.

I also advised Dilip this:

Please read my comment.

The characters were really well chosen...and we all know towards whom Vulturo is inclined to, dont we?

Ill also say just one thing Chetan....youve repeatedly said about that why everything is always black and white...there can be several shades of gray too. But no..people simply refuse to acknowledge the existance of a color called gray (you know what i mean ).

Strangely, it also echoes what Bush once said" Either you are with us , or you are with them", no middle of the road thing... and Im sure you know as well as I do that some bloggers like to lick the boot of GWB .

Certain American teenagers so certain things in order to be hep or cool. I also believe Chetan after reading some comments in some blogs that not all libertarians are actually libertarians. Yes there are people like Yaza but most simply project themselves as libertarians cuz they think its kinda cool.

Finally a reminder, a sequence like this has to have the baap of all blog commentators at some stage- yes Im referring to the person that ur thinking....Kya Yaar Tu Bhi. :))

Gaurav said...

Waiting for the next chapter.

Amit Kulkarni said...

What patience, and typing stamina you have. I bet that you would be a prolific research paper contributor :)

TTG said...

What the f***! On some other day I would have ranted but after reading this piece my throat has gone dry out of expletives.

I can't believe I've missed this f-ing post. What the f have I been wasting my time for DAMMIT!

Just a note to Mr. D('Souza) - it's Bhoosa Aadmi, not Straw Man.

seven_times_six said...

John Galt's speech was funnier than this I say.

Reg. early morning with Ayn Rand, it is much advised if you ask me.
A quick read followed by some quick liftings of the 1000 page tome for a
spot of weight training takes care of both the mind and the body.

Dilip, your making fun of the word strawman while being pointed out your strawman fallacies
brings to mind yet another strawman --- the scarecrow of the Wizard of Oz --- who alas had a head filled
with straw. I suggest going to the Wizard of Yaz(ad) that he might give you a book of Ayn Rand that you
could recite every morning.

Dilip D said...

7_6: I have a copy of Ayn Rand, some book. Didn't read it, but gave it to someone who was standing on the balcony. Its weight pulled him off the balcony and he lies moaning on the ground below as I yell at him: "You Bhoosa Aadmi! Next time, Break My Window!"

TTG: Satisfied?

buck said...

Is Chetan right? No. But which part is wrong and why?

rotfl...this line was da bomb. :-)

although i might be missing out on a lot as i'm familiar with ravikiran rao's blog, but don't know much about the others you've parodied.

Chetan said...

Everyone: Sorry for the delay in replying. Was busy rallying the forces for revolution.

Suhail Kazi Thanks. I think the broken window was a bit too sharp, seems to have everyone in splinters.

Crystal Blur: (Dole Cholat) Is that really you? I am not even going to risk pinching myself there. I did rather prefer living in the delusion that I managed to make you laugh. Thanks for the compliment and also for those howlarious posts.

Dilip LOL! If that is not a Catch-22 situation, I don't know what is. That was quite hilarious. And also thanks for taking this sportingly.

Artful Dodger Thanks for taking the time to write that long comment. I am thinking of paying a tribute to Kya yaar tu bhi myself. However, not sure how I will be able to squeeze him in. You should check out his comment here on Nilu's blog. You will fall off your seat laughing. He writes them under the pseudonym beating deadhorse. And I am thinking of caricaturing you as well for your habit of artfully managing to sneak in a pot-shot at Amit Varma while pretending that it is not ad hominem. :)

Gaurav: The fourth installment is taking longer than expected.

Amit Kulkarni Arre baba just got out of academics. Don't even talk of research papers. Besides I am such a procrastinator that even if I may like writing research papers, I end up doing a shoddy job squeezing them in just past the deadline.

TTG Thanks for linking this post and sending hat tip to desipundit. Also do mail me or provide a link here to what you consider to be your best rant till date. I am planning to write a post giving the context behind this series for lay readers and hence was searching for your most representative rant. I found a lot of good ones but couldn't decide on a particular one.

Seven_times_six: :) This is a pleasant surprise. After our last back and forth I wasn't sure how you would react to this. Thanks for taking this sportingly. I cracked up after reading about your exercise regiment with Atlas Shrugged. That was funny.

buck: Thanks. Don't worry, you are not the only one who is missing out. This is a compilation of comments on the blogs discussions I have followed. Only about 4-5 people will get all the jokes here. About the line you liked, I wanted to caricature Ravikiran as someone who looks beyond the obvious than other wannabe cartelians.

TTG said...

Hey sorry for not getting back to you for so long. My personal favourite is "Road Rage"

But feel free to pick one you think is better!